Tasty Buttered Toast

Quips and Quandaries from a re-employed house husband

Parting Ways

Behind her eyes there’s curtains…
And they’ve been closed to hide the flames,… remains…

She knows… their future’s burning,
But she can smile just the same, same…

And though her mood is fine today
There’s a fear they’ll soon be parting ways

Christmas morning my Grams said goodbye to my Gramps as he succumbed to The Lord calling him home to heaven.  I cannot begin to express the strength or courage my Grams has shown through this whole ordeal for the last month or two.  The visits from the Hospice nurse giving her Gramps vitals and how well or poorly he happened to be doing since her last visit.  The pain on her face when he would “forget” to put on his required oxygen while going about his business around the house.

She even told me about how rather than being a real “bitch” and harping on him to keep his oxygen on, she would rather enjoy the remaining days she had with her best friend instead of spending them at odds with him and his hindered memory.  Through it all she remained by his side, from what I understand finding it difficult to get sleep for fear something may happen that would need her attention.

The relationship my Grams & Gramps had been the poster child for what a sucessful marriage and home life should be… they succesfully raised eight children of their own, along with countless foster children that came through the front door; always accepting them as part of the family and never turning someone away if they could help it.

Standing, like a statue
A chin of stone, a heart of clay, hey…

After the funeral, while everyone was sharing memories of Gramps and their experiences with him, Grams walked up to the mic with a message to everyone in attendance with a significant other.  She said that she really wished she could talk to Gramps about everyone showing their condolences, sharing memories, and celebrating his life.

But she couldn’t.

She reminded us that we need to cherish our time with our significant others… we need to not take that time for granted because someday that person won’t be there to talk to or to share a thought with.  Even in mourning, she wanted to pass along advice and remind us just how fragile life is.

And though he’s too big a man to say
There’s a fear they’ll soon be parting ways

Grams laid Gramps to rest December 29th with the whole family in attendance.  Many a tear was shed, and the void left by his passing won’t ever be filled.  What we do have is the memories of the good times and conversations past.

* Lyrics from the song “Parting Ways” by Pearl Jam


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7 thoughts on “Parting Ways

  1. This is beautifully written. Such a true portrait of your Grams and Gramps. They have definitely been a portrait of what we want to be!

  2. Beautifully told…remember her words and cherish each other. They set a wonderful example for you to follow.

  3. So beautiful, and it rings so true. I am guilty of taking my husband for granted sometimes. And now? I’m going to go hug him and tell him how much he means to me.
    Writing this has helped you continue the love that Gramps felt for other people. Even here, way down South, his love is spreading.

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